Three Month Eating Disorder Recovery Update (Sam)

How It’s going

Homemade gingerbread muffin as part of snack

I’m sorry this update won't be very exciting. Not much has happened in the last couple of weeks. Mom and I still do yoga and meditation every morning. I had my usual biweekly weigh-ins, dietitian appointments and weekly therapy appointments. I am continuing to challenge fear foods and working on completing everything on my meal plan. One of the problems was that mom was waking up late due to her work schedule which was leading to late breakfasts and skipped snacks. To help with this I have started preparing some breakfasts so that we can start our days early enough to fit in all my meals and snacks. Another problem was that I was struggling to eat everything I need to during meals and snacks I must serve myself. Now mom and I are going to pre make snacks that I struggle with preparing on my own to see if that helps. This week we also had an appointment with my team and an autism specialist to discuss the interactions between autism and eating disorders along with how autism will affect my treatment and strategies to support me.

Lunar Eclipse

Otherwise, I have been busy with schoolwork because it is nearing the end of the semester. I also moved on from working on affirmations and self care to exploring my thoughts, emotions, and different parts of myself. I did do a few fun things too. On November 8 mom and I woke up early to see the lunar eclipse. More recently I spent some time outside and made a snowman, baked some gingerbread muffins, and visited with a friend.

Snowman

How I Feel

The most challenging breakfast for me

I don’t feel much different since the last update. I’m trying not to disappoint everyone and I’m trying to obey my faulty beliefs to keep my mind at ease, but I feel like I’m failing at both. Last update I also mentioned there was some tension between mom and me. Since then, I worked with my therapist to communicate how I felt, and mom talked to her therapist which I feel helped reduce the tension. Although, I know now that this tension comes from mom's impatience and her not accepting how I feel as well as my fear and lack of motivation.

Sunset on our way home from appointments

On a more positive note, I noticed a couple of things recently. First, when I was younger, I used to run to go anywhere around the house. A while ago I realized I had stopped doing that and was walking around the house to wherever I needed to go. I thought that it was just part of growing up because that is what adults do. Although, it made me sad to think about it, I kind of felt like I lost something. The other day I needed a pencil and ran to my room to grab one from my desk then ran back to the dinning room where I was working. I ran. When I thought about it, I noticed that I have been running around the house more lately like when I was younger. The other thing I noticed is that I’m dreaming more lately or at least noticing my dreams more than I have been during the past 2 years. Anyway, these were just a couple of small changes I noticed recently in between all the struggles.

A resilient little butterfly I found flying around in the snow

Current Goals

• Weight restoration

• Continue to be trusting, open and honest regarding recovery

• Follow my meal plan as best I can